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READ AN EXCERPT
From Revelation One: I don't tell the truth about my life.
I have always considered it a sin not to live authentically. In fact, as long as I can remember, I was angriest with myself when I wasn't truthful to others or honest with myself. Therefore, I was both shocked and saddened when I realized that, for many of my 50+ years, I hadn't been telling the truth about my life, especially to myself. My first inkling of this profound self-discovery occurred in 1995, after I had read Muriel Rukeyser's quote about the impact of a woman's truth. A mid-twentieth-century poet, Rukeyser believed that poetry could change us for the better, a belief confirmed by the story I am about to tell.
Prior to that fateful moment of recognition, I thought I spoke my truth by living what I perceived to be an authentic life. I was lovingly raised in the classic 1950's tradition by a stay-at-home mom and a working father, yet had no interest in being a traditional wife, or in having children. When I graduated from college in 1966 and married my college sweetheart, I wanted to be a career woman before the term was invented. By 1970, I was the first female hotel sales director in the Nation's Capital and the first woman president of my professional association. I believed I had achieved these goals by being true to myself, an assessment that was accurate only to a point.
While I bragged about having a lucky star over my head, I actually attributed my good life to a combination of luck and my individual efforts. Not only did I have a loving family and friends, I was healthy, had a college education, was considered attractive, and had an exciting and challenging work life.
I thought I lived life the way I wanted to. I thought I was telling my truth. For instance, rather than subscribe to the feminist movement in the 1960's, I walked my own path, agreeing with my grandmother's philosophy that "women are not a category, but part of the human race." Over the years, I equated my independence with living authentically. However, when I read Rukeyser's sentiment about women not telling the truth, my normally self-assured confidence was severely shaken.
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